How to find a man in 100 dates…THE END!

 

Where to begin…. I started this blog over 4 1/2 years ago, with one aim to find love, the kind that made your heart skip a beat but also the kind that was real. And wow have I found that…. 

I last left you back in June 2014, nearly 3 years ago when my darling date #24 and I had just moved into our first home together. And 3 years later we are moving out now and this time… WE ARE ENGAGED!!!!!!!!! Yes someone wants to marry me, with all my crazy and ridiculousness. 

The past 4 years with My Mr Pedro have been amazing, hard, fun, crazy, loving, interesting and a whole load more. What I have come to realize is that nobody is perfect, and no relationship is, and anyone that says it is lying, a MASSIVE HUGE LIE. Relationships take work, and even after four years they take work. The further down the road you get the more you need to work. All those moons ago I wanted something real, something honest, and that is exactly what I have. This amazing Man has changed my world, he has made me grow up, made me mellow, made me embrace my crazy, he has made want to be the best version of myself. And now we are GETTING MARRIED… Can you believe that someone wants to Marry this Crazy lady!! I know right, I can’t believe it…. I can hear my sister still saying it is crazy, it truly is. 

Whilst we are here I can’t bring this blog to a close without mentioning, dates #1 – #23, although none of them are reading this I am sure, I do want to give a shout out to you all, you made me crazy, you made me sad and you made totally confused at times. BUT most of all you made grateful and ready for when I met the one. I believe everything happens for a reason and I think that reason was to get to this point, so thank you. 

This post is the full and final end to the blog but also a dedication to Date #24, you make me smile more than I thought possible, you make me feel accepted in a world where sometimes we can feel alone, you make me crazy in a way that makes me want to pull my hair out but at the same time knowing that this is normal! You are my favourite person, I love your whole face forever and I can not wait to BE YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!!! 

As someone once said, if you are lucky enough to find a weirdo, never let them go.

xxxx

 

An unexpected year…….with an unexpected boyfriend

Hey all my long lost readers,

I have something to tell you….I STILL HAVE A BOYFRIEND, the same boyfriend too!! So I thought it was about time I did another blog post, it is very timely because it is almost a year ago to the day that I posted my last blog. And what a year that has been!

Yesterday we moved into our first home together, and it couldn’t be better! So, how is life in a relationship? Well, it is different from being single that is for sure. Which yes, dear sister, you did tell me. Now don’t get me wrong I wouldn’t change it for the world but things have changed a lot in the last year. Some of my friends may say I have grown up, some even say I have changed and some, just those few say I am boring. But the biggest difference is I am happy, like really happy. Now, as I said in my first blog post all that time ago, I was looking for love, real love, love that made my heart skip a beat but also one that was REAL, and I am pleased to say I have found that. If some people think that makes me boring, then I am more than happy with that because real love can be boring, it can be mundane, it is sitting down to help me plan out my meals for the week, it is going food shopping with me because I can’t carry bags, it is meeting me from a late shift because I don’t like walking home alone. It is all of these things and more. However it is also the fun stuff, the jokes that only you two think about, it is seeing the same thing and thinking the same thing, it is date nights and holidays and time doing and saying nothing together oh and it is sharting on each other!! Opppsss – I didn’t think it was going to happen, and bless him all he said was, are you ok!! I thought it was a fart!!! Anyway it is all of these things, to me, that make it real, it is what I was searching for and am lucky enough to have found.

However it hasn’t all been plain sailing, wouldn’t it be nice to end the blog there, she met a nice man, and that was it, they lived happily ever after. As with all relationships it comes with its trails and tribulations, mainly me being a little mental, all girls do it right? Don’t tell me if you haven’t I do not want to know. Having to get used to another person in the bed is another thing, I mean, how much space does one person need in a double bed!!!!!!!!! And the snoring after a few beers, I thought living above a night club was bad! But this is just another element of being in a real functioning relationship, because if you have forgotten, I haven’t had that many, real ones that is, I have had many dysfunctional fictional ones where in my mind they are like a boyfriend to me. Anyway that, hopefully is long gone now. So what I am trying to say is, internet dating works, you have to keep at it and get through those dates with guys with pleather jackets, and the ones who mess you about  but there are some good guys out there.

So I think it is time I said goodbye to the blog, I would like to thank all my wonderful readers for, well, reading and for all the dates that were and are still totally unaware that I have written about them and finally to date number 24, thank you for being wonderful and putting up with me, especially after I sharted on your leg you still want to move in with me!!

That is it for now girls and guys! xxx

PS. I am sure date number 24 has a different version of events, but who wants to hear his anyway!!!

 

Date 27-29 #unexpected surprises = an unexpected boyfriend

So I have something to tell you all, I can’t keep it in until the end of the blog… I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!! And breathe…Ok so now that is out the way let me explain the last few dates and how I have come to be off the market, taken, I.A.R (in a relationship) or whichever you like to call it.

Date 27-  So our last date he made me dinner at his, we had arranged to see each other at the weekend we decided to keep it low key and he came over to mine to watch a DVD and meet my housemates. Now housemates are a key in this type of situation, they are the first friends to meet new love interests without having to create a intense friend meeting situation. This particular situation worked well for me he came in and met my housemates and chatted to them for a while before we headed to my bedroom to watch a film. It was a nice relaxed meeting and I felt like they all got on well for a first meeting.  It was here at this point that I think things took a more coupley turn, (coupley: adj. The act of acting as a couple, even when the two people in question aren’t actually a couple yet.) It was just generally a lovely evening and again I was enjoying getting to know him more and I feel totally comfortable with him.

Date 28 – So after our 2 very informal dates we decided that we should go and do something a bit more exciting and datey. I have wanted to go to the sky lounge for ages and I heard there are amazing views of London and I thought it would be a nice place to go on a date. However, we were due to go here on the Friday but I kind of wanted to see him sooner and he invited me to meet his work colleagues on Thursday evening. It was a really nice idea and it felt totally like the right thing to do.  His work mates were all really nice and really easy to get on with and very welcoming. It was nice to see him in this environment and see how he was around his friends. It really made me fancy him as seeing a new side to him defo made more convinced I was seeing the right person.

Date 29: The sky lounge: So as we had planned we went to Sky lounge for drinks, he emailed me before to ask what drink I wanted, I said I fancied a glass of presseco and sure enough when I arrived, he not only had what I asked for but more, he had ordered a bottle of champagne and not just the cheap stuff. Cute right? The weather wasn’t great so it wasn’t too busy and we managed to get a seat sheltered from the rain. It didn’t matter too much as we chatted away and decided that we would talk about 5 things that we didn’t know about each other. It was nice, it was easy and it felt like we were just getting to know each other more and more.  We moved onto Northbank where he had made reservations, this place is lush but not too posh, just right, it was a really good choice. He called to make sure we had a table by the window, nice touch there! Dinner was great the evening was great. We ended the night in Madison overlooking St Pauls. Now it was here that we had another drink, only one that he would let me pay for, we were stood having a chat and he asked me if he could start calling me his Girlfriend. I obviously said yes, he makes me smile alot, I enjoy his company, I want to spend time with him and now although some have said oh is it too soon, it doesn’t feel like that for us, the way I view it is I don’t want to see anyone else and I don’t want him too and I know he doesn’t so why not give it a go and see what happens. He could be the love of my life or he could be the right person for me right now, either way I have a big smile on my face!

So dear readers, we have come this far, thanks for sticking with me ,it isn’t goodbye, it is just see you soon.

 

10/10 he made it, I made it, he found me, I found him either way it takes 24 dates to find a man kids, don’t give up hope!

 

 Introducing Mr Unexpected…. any man who can plank on a silver ball is a keeper in my eyes!

 

 

!

Date 26 #unexpected surprises

Source: OK Cupid

Location: His flat

So things with Mr unexpected surprises have been going well  and I was enjoying getting to know him and we had arranged a mid-week dinner date. He was cooking for me, yes a man that can cook, turns out the myth that I had in my head that my Dad was the only man who could do things for himself was wrong!  He was very considerate of my new healthy lifestyle and asked me what I wanted to eat,  I found a picture on Facebook of my friends dinner that looked amazing so suggested something similar, turns out people who post what they are eating helped me out!

I arrived at his house at 8ish as I had had Personal training; luckily his housemate was out so we had the place to ourselves. He was really thoughtful with not only his food choices but had also got some fizzy water in so that I could have a healthier spritzer too. Now this to me was a really kind thing to do, for me it is the little things.  Dinner was great and we chatted easily still, I am really enjoying getting to know this guy and it was nice to see him in his home environment.  We ended up chatting, and well you know, kissing on the sofa for most of the evening, before heading to bed. Yes I stayed, now I am not going to go into to details apart from say that I don’t believe in any date rules about waiting until a certain point to be intimate with someone, I believe and yes this has taken some time for me to work out, but you should be intimate with someone when it feels natural and you as two grown adults both feel like it is something you want to do. Either way I walked to work with a smile on my face the next day! 🙂

So…3 dates down with this guy and I am really starting to like him, not in a superficial way that involves any drama or just having a text relationship, not with him being a dick or me being dramatic (yes that has happened before, SHOCK!) but with it being something real and something that feels natural. We have arranged to see each other again so who knows what can happen, all I can say is this dater gets a Walker thumbs up…

Rating: 9/10 for being so thoughtful…..

Date 25 #unexpected surprises

Source: Ok Cupid

Location: All over shoreditch…

So we arranged this date drunkenly at the end of date 1, but the next day I still wanted to see him. We had been in touch for most of the week whilst I was away with work. It was nice for someone to be doing all the asking out and chasing. It is the first time since the boy that hid in the dark (more of that in my book!!) that someone had been really keen to see me again and been man enough to admit he was interested. I felt like I was getting to know him over text, which we all know I am wary of but it felt like it was at a natural pace.

By the time Saturday came around I was really looking forward to seeing him to see if my drunken excitement was real when sober. I am on a health kick so told him that I didn’t want to drink too much, he was ok with that so we planned to meet in Shoreditch and go for some drinks and maybe go to Bar Kick somewhere I had wanted to try on a date for a while.

We met at Old street and went for a drink in Shoreditch Grind, http://www.shoreditchgrind.com/ it is a nice and chilled bar and great place to start an early date on a Saturday, check it out. As soon as I saw him I felt relaxed, I was wearing a dress that I felt hot in and he looked like he had made an effort too! We decided to head to Bar Kick, but it was pretty packed and defo not a Saturday night vibe, loads of groups of guys and it was really hot.  If you decide to go defo book in advance, it looks like great fun.  We decided to head to another bar, by this time we had had a cheeky snog, just a cheeky one but it made it feel much more relaxed and like we weren’t waiting for it to happen. After a few more drinks we headed to a nice Vietnamese place called, Cay Tre for dinner.– http://caytre.co.uk/   The chat so far had been light and fun, as we sat down to dinner we talked more about relationships, he asked about what Banter boy and the Sexy Sri Lankan looked like and what happened with them, it was nice to be able to talk about past flings and dates. We did talk about the whole texting thing, and he asked what my thoughts on it were, I just said that texting someone the whole time is nice but you feel like you just get to know what that person is doing but you don’t get to know them. Yes I have been burnt by this in the past but I get a feeling, and yes I maybe wrong ladies and gents, but this one may be different, he doesn’t seem like he just wants to text all day long but he also seems like he wants something real, which is nice and refreshing when you have been on as many dates as I have.

As I said I wasn’t drinking on this date which is odd for a date I know but it was nice that I was able to tell him about my non-drinking and healthy lifestyle. He was really thoughtful about this and got me a white wine spritzer before I arrived, but he doesn’t get any extra points for this as he knows I like it as he has read the blog. He does however get points for being thoughtful about the drink choice.

I don’t know what else to say about this date but that I had a really nice time and again enjoyed his company, we headed back to Brixton and went for a drink there so that he knew that I was home safely, pretty sweet in my book, especially after some of the thoughtless tools I have been out with. I really enjoyed this date and am really enjoying getting to know him. We have arranged our next date already, he asked me, he defo gets points for that,its normally me asking so its really nice for someone to do the asking! So until the next date…. keep me dating…

Rating:  For being so thoughtful 8/10.

Date 24 #unexpected surprises

Source: Good old OK Cupid – give it a try I know I have had some odd dates, but not complete weirdos plus worst comes to worst you will get a laugh!

Location: The Trinity Arms – http://www.trinityarms.co.uk/ Great pub for a secret garden and great vibe any day of the week.

So this young gentleman and I had sent a few emails back and forth online, he gave me his number and we got to chatting a bit. He seemed normal and friendly by all accounts and he asked to meet me for a drink. Win win in my book, after the few dates I had had I was just hoping he wasn’t wearing a weird shirt or had some weird facial disorder. I am not sure why but I was really nervous before this date, I have had a string of bad luck with the dates previous to this one and had finally got rid of the idiot that was banter boy so I finally felt like I had my A Game back, maybe that’s what was making me nervous.

We had arranged to meet at 8pm on a Monday, totally rogue for a date night but I was due to have a busy week so Monday it was. We met at the tube, and for some really strange reason I felt really awkward when we first met. I kissed him on the cheek and we headed towards to pub, in my usual style I did not stop talking, I didn’t really give him a chance to speak before we got to the pub, with me rambling about this and that, but he didn’t seem to mind.

We got to the pub and it was relatively empty, he offered to buy me a drink, 1 point scored, if nothing else he was going to beat some of the others! We decided to go outside and instantly the chat was easy, there weren’t many people in the secret garden so it was rather quiet, but it didn’t really matter as the chat flowed so easily. We talked about everything, jobs, travel, school, family – by we I mean me, of course I gave me the classic date story, it’s not really my date story, more like my first time you meet me story, which is basically my life in a nutshell, a very long, big a bit boring at times nutshell. Anyway he seemed ok with the chat and after a few glasses of wine we decided to move inside.

It was probably at this point that I had decided he was worth a second date, he was a gentleman, he wouldn’t let me buy any drinks, I made him let me in the end, but overall we got on and I liked what I had got to know. So in my mind I had already decided that I wanted to see him again. We were talking about families, and I was obviously talking about mine, it was at this point that he says ‘ Is now the time to tell you that I am divorced?’ I replied with ‘well, erm…’ before I could finish he said ‘oh and that I have a 2year old daughter!’ I was totally shocked and in my true style (well mine and my sisters) had a 100 questions. He was really open and honest about it all and explained that he and his ex-wife had parted on amicable friendly terms and he was still very much a part of his daughters life. Now, I know what a few of you will be thinking, don’t bother, a 29yr old with a kid and an ex, BUT it didn’t put me off, he was lovely and we had had fun and I don’t doubt that we will the next time I see him! (yes we have a second date, and this time he gets a saturday!!!) I don’t see why him being divorced and having a child makes any change to how I view or feel about him, it may do further down the line but I would like to get to know him more before that changes my mind.

After that bombshell, which opened up the evening a bit more as it allowed for honesty, we headed to another pub, we were having such a good time and I was really enjoying his company. It is the first date since the sexy Sri Lankan where the chat has flowed so easily and I didn’t once look at my watch to see what the time was. We ended up in a rather dodgy pub near my flat, where we started drinking desparados at midnight and an acoustic band turned up and started having some weird session and dancing around. It was all a bit odd, but we had fun and we had a cheeky, well not so cheeky, public snogging session!! For those that have ever seen me pull on a night out, it was similar to this, one of the band even asked us how long we had been together. Anyway we snogged, chatted and drank until the early hours!

As I said he had opened up the date to honesty and I don’t know weather it was that or the booze, but I suddenly felt like I had to tell him about the blog. It just kind of came from nowhere, I told him about the challenge that I had set myself and he said it sounded fun and he was intrigued to read! I so pleased he took it so well as I have previously worried about what some of the dates might think about it! He seemed cool with it and had some questions about weather I just went on dates for the blog, I said no and that is the truth, well apart from my one and only girl date! He read the blog and funnily enough he said that he like most people didn’t like the sound of Banter Boy and that I seemed to have most fun with the Sexy Sri Lankan. Anyway he was nice, we had fun, we snogged, he knew about the blog, he seemed interested and I am looking forward to seeing him on Saturday. We have been in touch over text since our date which is nice, I am weary that I don’t want to get into another text relationship as that always ends badly but we shall see with this one…until my next date, as always get me dating.

Rating: 8/10 – purely to give him something to work from!

#This girl needs you to get her a date

 

 So…. I have again been quiet on the dating front, I needed to take some time away from dating, from the bad dates and from the emotionally inept men I seem to find myself emotionally attached to. Whilst this has been great for my soul and my emotional state it has got me thinking about the ways I meet guys. So I have done the online dating thing, no I am not giving up on that but as you can see it has been difficult to meet someone on doesn’t turn up hungover, want to leave after 45 minutes and is not wearing a pleather shirt. My friends have set me up, that turned out to be interesting as he was emotionally retarded knob. SOO what else do I do…. How else do I meet people who might want to be my friend and see where it goes. Ok yes I am a girl and I over think, but I am not asking for marriage or even for them to be my boyfriend,  initially I am asking someone to see if they like me and just be a bit open minded and see where it goes! Is it that hard to find in this god damn city. Turns out it is!

 

As all my smug married, couple friends say, it will happen when you stop looking for it. But I ask you, would you stop looking if you had been single for as long as I have been. Now as I said in my first post I have had a number of flings, most gone on for longer than they should have, mainly because I am more emotionally attached than them, oh and they are complete DOUCHE BAGS. This does mean now that I am after something real, something that is exciting and fun and doesn’t really require a funny blog post other than ‘I really like him, he made me laugh and I want to see him again.’

 So readers here is your chance to feature in my blog, if you can answer one of these:

 –          Do you want to date me? (if it is a no…. then do not respond!)

–          Do you know someone who wants to date me, and serious suggestions please, not just creepy Pete because it seems like a good idea. Someone you genuinely think I might get on with.

–          Do you have a great idea for me to meet new potential dates?

 If so please get in touch findaman100dates@gmail.com

 

Date 23 #The return of the speed dating scouser

Source: Please see blog post number 6 ..https://howtofindamanin100dates.wordpress.com/2012/12/02/date-number-6-speed-dating-scouser/

Location: http://www.thewarwick.co.uk/location/

Ok so as I said in my last post I was fully engaged in the internet dating business again and was talking to people left right and centre and up popped an email from the speed dating scouser. As I mentioned back then, I really quiet liked him and we had good chat, well as much good chat as you can get from a speed date. He messaged me to say that he wasn’t sure what had happened to me since our speed date and he hadn’t heard from me. My response was, you did hear from me we arranged 2 other dates but you cancelled both of them! Men forget things VERY easily don’t they! We started chatting again and I thought why not give him another chance, he had explained that he had stuff going on at the time with his ex and moving and work etc. alright mate I get it excuses aside I quiet liked him and thought why not meet for another drink. I did however forget his name, had deleted his number but he still wanted to see me, so who am I to deny him the pleasure of my company.

Now I kept the banter with this boy up over the weekend and kept telling him he wasn’t allowed to flake as this was his last chance. He text me in the morning saying he was fragile and this Monday was blue. Ok so Firstly a date on a Monday, a tricky one but I wasn’t going to give up a a proper date for the renowned flaker and speed dater. And secondly, MAN UP BOY. He basically begged me for another date and there he was early doors on the Monday saying he was tired and he couldn’t have a late one on a Monday night. I was waiting for the bail, I even suggested just meeting for a coffee… in hindsight, I wish I had had the bail or gone for a coffee or even had a dinner with Mussolini that would have been better.

We met at the Warwick, his suggestion, close to his work, god men are lazy aren’t they. We met early, 5.30 on a Monday early… WOW I was in for a treat! I walked in and saw him and thought, alright you’ve got yourself a drink and not me, we know the rules about this.  He did buy me a drink, got out cash and everything, what is it with guys giving me money for drinks. We found a  seat, in a very busy pub and started chatting. I seemed to remember a lot about him and vice versa, so he defo gets a point for that, but apart from that he didn’t bring his A game. I admit that he couldn’t really bail on me as I would never have seen him again, but he announced that he had 4 hours sleep as he had got on it on Sunday night. I love a party with the best of them, but am I the only one who doesn’t think that is acceptable when your on the second chance with a date, and a second chance that you chased boy! Apart from this we did get on well and had a laugh about the fact that my housemate knows a friend of his, I think he got a little bit jarred by this as he was concerned I had heard all the hooligan stories from his uni days, well the answer, not that I told him, was yes I had. We had had one drink and I offered to get another in, yes I am all about splitting things, but he asked for a soft drink, I then joked, ‘Do you want to get off!?’ he instantly answered yes can we reconvene when I am feeling better and my banter is better. WHAT your bailing again after an hour and one drink… YES it had happened again.

So as we left, I was obviously a little annoyed by this, he suggested some dates most of which I was busy, he hugged me, whilst I stood there and let my arms hang to the side, I wasn’t going in for a hug with a boy, who 1. I wasn’t going to see again, 2. didn’t bring his A game and 3. wasn’t polite enough to even stay fro 2 drinks. Needless to say I walked off at 6.35pm… yes that early and deleted his number and any other thoughts about him. I already have someone who is emotionally inept in my life,, yes we all know who it is no need to mention names, I wasn’t about to go and add another one to the list… off you go souscer boy, see you in 6 months when you are trying to sort your life out a bit again…I really have no interest in ‘dating’ someone who can’t be bothered to make the effort for me, I am 100% worth the effort, just  a shame he will never find that out!

Anyway readers, onto the next, surely the bad luck doesn’t come in 3s and my next date won’t be as bad as 22 and 23. 

Rating: 1/10 – and that was me being kind…. I need to get back up to the 8-9’s please readers!

 

 

 

Date 22 #A Pleather wearing Mr Bean

Source: OK Cupid

Location: http://www.thesunclapham.co.uk/

As you all know recently I have tried to hit the internet dating hard and that is exactly what I had been doing, texting, emailing, what’s apping an array of different guys, still in the hope that I would eventually meet the right one for me.  I had arranged dates left right and centre with guys, however as I was to learn with this date, it really isn’t a good idea to get too many dates booked in as they can turn out to be some what of a disaster.

This date had been rather keen on the text and email ahead of our date, yes I know its what all girls want right and I had had enough of messing around with the bad boys of the world, maybe it was time to give the keeno a chance. He seemed nice, had a lot to say so I thought why not see if he is nice in person and maybe a bit of fun. We arranged to meet for a roast on a Sunday, now ladies and gents this is a bad idea for a first date, you can’t get out quickly and you can’t just make your excuses half way through and leave, which it turns out I wanted to do.

Firstly, he was 35 minutes late, which is acceptable as he text and was stuck in traffic on a bus. We were meeting at Clapham Common as it was half way between both of us, he made a big deal about where we were meeting which I found a bit odd, he didn’t seem to know London too well but that wasn’t going to put me off.  I was, as my Dad always says tired and emotional, basically I was hungover as hell and really not in the mood. We met and instantly it was a no, he was wearing a pleather shirt, for those not in the know this is a fake leather shirt, probably the most horrendous shirt I have ever seen in my life and looked a little awkward like Mr Bean. I am not one to judge 100% on looks but the right man for me will make me forget the other men around me and make me smile, not only did the pleather shirt make me cringe but the dry skin on his face made me feel even more uncomfortable, I have said it once and I will say it again you need to come with your A game to a date and this boy looked a little bit like he had brought his C Game.

We headed for the sun and began to chat. He had no banter whatsoever and I wanted the date to be over after about 15 minutes. He basically spoke at me for the first 20 minutes about his family, his Dad being loaded, his Mum finding him dates and how he had one last night, now I am open to hearing about your life but please stop to be aware that your date is BORED.  Ask me questions about me, have an actual conversation with me, make me think that there is nothing else going on around me, don’t make me look at my watch and try and find a way to leave. When I am hungover I am normally on FIRE with my banter and fun times, but this boy just bored me beyond words, he was very monotone and didn’t really engage with me at all. We had an awkward moment at the bar when he assumed I was going to pay for his roast, as if I was going to treat you to dinner, I have known you 5 minutes and you are really rather boring.

I ate quickly and said that I had timed things rather badly and need to go and buy my housemate some goldfish, this wasn’t a lie but I didn’t need to go there and then, but I had to get out of this situation and FAST. We had a quick coffee and I was out, shortly after an awkward hug, getting ever closer to his dry face.  He said something about going for dinner next week, COME ON, didn’t you hear me use the excuse of, I am leaving to buy goldfish, some boys don’t just get the hint. I know I have been victim to, ‘he isn’t that into you’ but this buy needs the guide to, ‘excuses women use to get out of dates when they aren’t interested!’

Needless to say I haven’t got in touch with him since our relatively bad date, I feel bad for Mr Bean but he couldn’t have been further from what I am looking for. I am a firm believer in fate and the right person will come along and that it isn’t hard to find a boy who is interested in you, but what is hard is to find someone who is on your level, fun, not a commitment phobe and is interested in seeing you and seeing where things go.  The dating game is hard and a bit disheartening at times, if I hear one more time, ‘You just haven’t met the right person yet’ I will throttle the person that says it  As much as I agree and I believe in fate, it can be really disheartening going on so many dates and not meeting anyone who is decent. Ok I have had fun so far, but as you can tell from this date it can really take it’s toll on you when all he does is talk at you and I love to talk.

However dear readers, I will not be put off, the right one is out there for me, where I do not know and I am sure you are asking the same thing, where is the right one for her… I will find him, but until then I will have some bloody good fun finding him and hopefully not to many boring dates!

Rating: 3/10 – I have no words.

Date 21 #Quiet, quirky, Kiwi

Source: OK Cupid – still by far one of the best websites…. get on it ladies…and single gents, maybe you could be number 22???

Location: http://b-soho.co.uk/ – a great little bar in soho it has a nice vibe and is pretty busy but not so much that you can’t hear each other.  Ladies and gents, a great little tip for finding bars for dates or just for meeting old friends is this website – http://www.designmynight.com/london  if you haven’t already heard of it it, it is great allows you to search area and what kind of night you are after and price… every serial daters dream! Check it out!

Right as you all know I had epically failed on the last date with this guy, I felt bad that he didn’t get the best of me, most dates do! I didn’t know if it was him, me or that I was getting bored of dating but I felt like he needed another date, if only to prove to myself that I hadn’t lost my dating mojo! We had had a bit of texting, but he wasn’t really into any kind of banter over text and unfortunately banter boy has got me onto the vibe so I was kind of missing that, however I was still keen to meet him. After the first date we had a peck on the cheek and I wasn’t overly eager to get any closer but as I have said I wasn’t in the right mood on our first date so the second date was all to play for, not that he knew that!

I arrived and he had a drink, now I still find this odd, why not guess at what I wanted, text me to ask, but do not just stand there with a pint and wait for me to say ‘Ok I will get a drink!’ In all fairness to him he did give me some money for the drink, but it still feels odd, I am all up for buying the drinks but don’t stand there with one! It just feels odd and quiet frankly a bit rude! We sat at the bar and started to chat, he is a really lovely guy and we talked all about my family and his and his home and we both elaborated on things that we talked about on the first date. It is refreshing to meet someone who is actually interested in things about me, however he just doesn’t have that OOMPH that I look for in a guy. We talked about nights out and everyone that knows me knows that I love to dance and have a good time, when I was telling him this he said, oh I never dance not unless I have had a fair few.  That isn’t something I can understand, I will dance with my hands in the air on a stage in a club alone simply on a soda and lime, I don’t want someone who is hiding in the corner.  Now it may seem that I am picking at small things, but I suppose to me it is the small things that matter, I mean we have stuff in common I do with most guys, but he just doesn’t excite me. Yes he makes me smile, but in the way that an old lady at a bus stop talking to me makes me smile, not in a way that makes my fanny gallop… (sorry siblings I used it again, but it is true, a keeper is one that makes your fanny gallop, or at least trot on the first and second date and unfortunately he doesn’t !)

So we had a few drinks in Bsoho and I suggested going for dinner. My all time favourite place on soho to eat is Bodeans, http://www.bodeansbbq.com/ – this place is  HEAVEN. Pulled pork and BBQ pork at its best, so much so that we had to wait 45 mins for a table, was worth it in the end. No really an ideal date location, especially for a girl to suggest BUT its so good and if a guy wants to be with me he needs to learn and quick, I like my food.  We had a drink whilst waiting and he carried on a conversation about how many dates I had been on… Now hold your hats kids, but I told him in a round about sort of way about the blog. I have recently been having the guilts about writing about potential lovers that I am starting to like and how they might react if they found out, I mean how would you feel? Girls I know we would all want to know what was said about us, but to my male readers, please tell me how would you feel if you had been on 3-4 dates with a girl talked a lot and she told you 6 months down the line when all was said and done that she had documented the whole situation on her blog? I need to know boys so get commenting. So I told him I had made a challenge to date 100 men in a year to try and find the one, he seemed a bit shocked and upset about this, his reaction was odd, he said things like, ‘ I have a lot of exs to fight off then!’ He just didn’t like the idea that I had and was dating a lot. We had on our first date talked about internet dating and how he didn’t show any photo’s of himself, I find that odd, I am an open book, I don’t hid anything, oh well maybe the blog but that is all. He said it was because he didn’t want to see someone he knows online, or more importantly for them to see him.  I asked him if he met someone online would he tell his friends and family how they met and he said no. To me that is odd, I am not ashamed of being single nor am I ashamed of internet dating so I am not comfortable with the fact that he was so against it.

I think that kind of sealed the deal for me, it was early and I was keen to get home, we had another drink for the road and headed towards the tube, we got on the tube together and he made some comments about things not getting naughty, it filled me with fear about having to snog him, I gave him a peck on the lips and he jumped off the tube. Back in the day I am sure I would have snogged his face off in front of a lot of commuters…maybe I have grown up or become more aware that I just don’t fancy all men, either way this guy didn’t get what he was after.

This guy is lovely, and sweet and I think he would suit a shy girl who doesn’t dance with her hands in the air and is ok with someone who doesn’t make a huge effort clothing wise for their dates….. I think if I carried on dating this guy I would end up being too much for him.  I do believe it would is easy to get a boyfriend, if you are willing to compromise on what you want and I am not, I will know when I meet him, I will just know, and so will you all I suppose!

Rating:  6/10 for being nice and chatty but he didn’t make me flutter, gallop or as my sister wants me to put it, he just didn’t make my heart skip a beat..

 

 

 

PS.  The biscuit question, firstly the classic I am a Tim Tam because I am hard on the outside and soft on the inside… come one boy be original… he then settled with shortbread with little chocolately surprises just like my personality… YAWN.. Come on that one has been used before!